What do the lonely do at Christmas or any other time?

Today's post isn't necessarily a Q & A segment, but, just some thoughts that I felt like sharing.

I remember once upon a time when I asked myself this question and didn't know the answer. The most painful part about the whole situation was that I was married, so it shouldn't have even been something that should have had to cross my mind but, it was what it was.

The answer isn't what I tried: seek someone outside of yourself & spouse/ significant other to fill that void. No not even fill the emotional void.

And you most certainly shouldn't try filling the void by being physical with someone (married or not!). When it is all said and done all you and that other person will have is the physical, and a relationship like that just doesn't work.

It isn't easy, but, there is a solution. Try taking that time to discover more about you. Establish, re-establish, or deepen your relationship with a higher power. My personal choice is Christ. Develop new interest. Once you have taken some time for you, if your spouse is willing, sit down and have a conversation. Be prepared to do what it takes to make your marriage work.

Working it out, however, isn't the solution for everyone. It absolutely will not work if both parties aren't willing to participate. In that situation, don't stress, don't try to hold on for dear life...LET IT AND him/her GO!!!

Does it hurt when it's over...of course it does, but, holding on to something that isn't meant to be always hurts worse.

During the holidays or any other time of year, reach out to a loved one, a family member or friend. Call, write, or go visit. Reconnect with those who love you unconditionally.

Donate your time or talents to those who are in need. One of my favorite things to do is to choose a child in need and try to fill their Christmas wish. The Salvation Army has a program called the Angel Tree. Another thing is find out about some of the elderly people who are in the nursing homes with no one to come see about them or even to stick their head in and say hello.

Go spend and evening or two talking with them. They'll often tell you how grateful they are that you came by or that you cared, but, in actuality YOU are the one who will be gaining so much. The wisdom that they share is priceless.

Find your own creative niche and make it work to the best of your ability.

There are ways around being lonely, but, until you find the answer that works for you, know that Cookie is always here to "listen" and I care.

Happy Holidays and God Bless,

Cookie